Our men’s Bible study group is going through the book of Ephesians, and this last week we studied Ephesians 5. I can remember as a child hearing about how these verses about marriage were so oppressive of women, and how we have evolved so much as a community and should be beyond this ancient rule. Every time I read these verse, I am struck by the gravity of each of the commands. Yes, wives are to “submit to their husbands”, but husbands are to “love” their wives, and not just to the best of their ability. They are to love their wives “as Christ love the church and gave himself up for her.”
Which is the harder task? Who is over who in this scenario? As I can see it, each is to lower him/herself to put the other’s wellbeing before the themselves. And certainly, the husband is asked to love his wife with a sacrificial love that only comes from God.
I am reminded of a youth group lesson I was conducting over this very subject in South Dallas. After reading the verses and discussing the topic, my adult leader asked me if I thought these verses were more for the time, and not applicable today. So I asked her, “If your husband loved you with the passion that Christ loved the church, would you have any problem submitting to his authority?” Her answer was “no”. This is the issue which is normally omitted when talking about wives submitting to their husbands. All that said, it is not “if my husband loves me as Christ loved the church, I will submit to him” or vice versa. Our call is to be obedient to Christ. Love well, submit well, and let the blessings of God rule in your life.
